“I Realized at a Young Age I Had to Love Myself”

Alanna: “I have had such a good year this past year, because I fell in love for the first time. November 4th is actually our year-and-six-month anniversary. There have been a lot of good moments in this relationship where I realized I have never experienced this kind of love before. I actually have a very rough past. I was surrounded by a lot of abuse and addiction from people who were close to me, and I had to be the one to take care of myself in a lot of ways for many years of my life. And not to say nobody ever loved me, but I realized at a young age that I had to be the one to be strong for myself, to love myself and to take care of myself. During those times that I felt most anxious and depressed and alone and unloved, I realized I can never be without love if I am love itself. I spent a lot of time alone developing that kind of relationship with myself.

“I realized I was worthy of this kind of love from another person, because I learned how to love myself first. I am so grateful for all of the pain I have experienced because through that pain I never want anyone else to feel unloved, so I make being love and sharing love my purpose. I would not have been anything close to who I am today if I had not gone through what I had gone through and learned to love myself, and I am very proud of myself for who I am now.”

~ Toms River

 

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